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Currently, the media has been all abuzz in the past 2-3 years regarding the resurrection of the natural hair movement.  I’d like to think of it as an awakening out of sleep or a revival.  A coming back to our roots  so to speak.  Our hair perception is often attributed to how we perceive ourselves socially, spiritually, and economically.  Gone are the afro picks and political standoffs that our brothers and sisters stood and died for in the 1960s and 1970’s.  Our current stance as a people is based much less on any political platform but upon individual acceptance, fashion, love of hair and pride for ones’ self.
As we gained acceptance into this white washed world we bleached, relaxed, pressed and weaved ourselves until our mirrors reflected the image of our oppressors.  We imitate but not regulate an industry that not only hates us.  When we walk into their establishments and pay top dollar as they overcharge us and drive our black beauty businesses out of minority neighborhoods they all the while watch your every move.  They have taken us for granted because we fail to value the inheritance of our curls and twirls.

My youngest son has the tightest, curliest afro much like my own hair.  My father asked me recently, “when you gonna cut that wool off?”   My reply was, “I don’t know.  I  really like it, just the way it is!”

Revelation 1 vs 13-15

“…and in the midst of the seven candlesticks one like unto the Son of man, clothed with a garment down to the foot, and girt about the paps with a golden girdle….his head and his hairs were white like wool, as white as snow; and his eyes were as a flame of fire; and his feet like unto fine brass, as if they burned in a furnace; and his voice as the sound of many waters…”

 

When I was about 8 years old on a hot summer day in South Carolina I remember enduring a stinging hot comb and some  grease.  “Hold your ears baby” was  a term so many of us remember from the good ol days.  I got burned behind my ears as my grandma told me, “It’s just a little while longer.”  I would feel so pretty when she was done with my bows and ribbons.  I’m free to go play!!!  As an afternoon storm approached to cool the humid air I swirled in circles in the yard along with my brothers with my eyes closed while the rain touched my face.  The drops sound like drumbeats that come to a screeching halt as I hear the porch screen door forcefully swing open.  My grandma demanded that I come in right now because my hair was going to get messed up.  “How is that?” I thought.  “I mean I just got it done.”  I think that was the one time I can remember my grandma Mary Jane giving me a serious spanking.  The next day I was sitting in a church with a pretty dress on with some parts of my hair puffy and some parts overly greased, lifeless,  and an empty soul.  Lol!

 

“Moreover the Lord saith, Because the daughters of Zion are haughty, and walk with stretched forth necks and wanton eyes, walking and mincing as they go, and making a tinkling with their feet; Therefore the Lord will smite with a scab the crown of the head of the daughters of Zion.”

Isaiah 3 vs 16-17

 

Flash forward several decades later…..the curses continue.

It’s the 1990’s and I’m holding on to a modeling career.  I had a super duper relaxed hair weave down to my waist.  My hair grew and fell out so many times that its hard to keep count.  Between baby #1 and #2 my wearing over processed weaves and an intro to wigs became a regular way of life.  My first attempt at going natural was undercover because at that time my daughter, who was 2-3yrs old at the time, said she wanted to have hair like mine, but it was not actually mine thought I bought.

 It is so important that our little girls and young women truly love what they see in the mirror.  From dark skin to light, big lips and hips, puffy, nappy, kinky, curly, wavy, whatever your description of hair is to love it all.  And you as a mother, sister, or friend is a big inspiration so be mindful of the image you are projecting whether you are team relaxed, team wigs, team weaves, team dreadlocks, or team natural.  And let me say that all of the above I have VIP membership in their department.

 

I had to start rethinking the image I was projecting.  I did  braids, twists, faux locks and afro textured wigs long before they were popular but when my hair grew to shoulder length I burnt my hair out unevenly with the constant use of a straightening comb so I went back to relaxers and weaves.

 

As baby #3 was approaching I was so addicted that the day before my middle son was born my hairdresser came to the house and gave me a relaxer and glue in weave at home.  As a mother of three at this point $150 for a hair habit addiction was out of the question.  This may have been where my at home relaxer nightmare began.

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Okay so my hair is falling out and is matted, short and lopsided and I thought what am I going to do?  I’m working and have 3 kids and no time or money.  So I did what I thought any stressed out mom should do.  I took out the  scissors and cut it all off, put on a wig cap and a brand new wig.  Yes I did!!  That was my 2^nd attempt at going natural.

So as the hair grew back again I didn’t know how to take care of it and the hairdressers were scared of it so I went and got sew in weaves with relaxer on the edges ( duh!).  So the weaves blended in with my hair and before you know it I was back to the creamy crack addiction.

 

Baby number 4 is a surprise and I was in between jobs and stressed out.  I was introduced to texturizers (sisters don’t be fooled it’s still a chemical change to your hair) and I was pregnant with a new job and crazy schedule.  I was relaxing my edges and the back of my hair while wearing wigs as I gradually cut the chemical out the rest of the hair ( but I must admit I liked the waves when it was gelled down ).  Constantly wearing wigs is not good for your edges by the way so be careful, but the hair does grow.  Fast forward two and a half years later when I lost my job but at this point I was so addicted to wigs that I was wearing wigs and not even going anywhere.  Foolishness.

So one day I take the wig off and the bantu knots came down.  My husband and son were so surprised because they didn’t think I had any hair since I had been wearing a wig for at least three years straight.  My eldest son offered to treat me to the hair salon that very day with his own money (sweet right!) but I was still insecure and to them it made no sense.

An old friend of mine has alopecia, another a bald spot on the top of her head, and another bald edges.  I was so tired of this losing battle.  Lord hear our prayers and forgive us of our sins!!!

So Passover 2011 was approaching and I was deciding how I wanted to wear my hair (women plan everything…shoes, make-up, hair nails, perfume for special occasions).  The plan was to do a wash and blow dry but the forecast called for heavy rain and once again I transformed into that 8 year old girl and pictured myself with a beautiful dress on and puffy and not so pretty wet hair.  So at the last minute I put several bantu knots in my hair with conditioner, put on a hair net, and a lace front wig that was straight, silky and to the waist….ok so I have this fantasy that I’m a North American Indian princess from the tribe of Gad or Reuben…don’t judge me!!!)

When I look in the mirror and see my reflection I thought I looked funny and my daughter thought so too.  So I decided to wear a turban at the last minute.  My ultimate goal is to have hair like my daughter!!!!

We had company for days and there was a lot of cleaning up to do.  A week later, I went to take those bantu knots out and my hair has dreaded!!!!  It was a nightmare.  I managed to get the ones out in the back and middle but the two on the sides and the one on the top would not budge.  I begged my kids and husband to help me.  If they didn’t come out I would have to cut my hair AGAIN!! (I’m really at this point getting to old for this).

 

So as I’m doing research on how to correct my problem and the do’s and don’ts of hair that’s when  I discovered  that there is a whole natural hair community on the internet while I was researching how to remove matted hair lol.  There are so many resources and options currently for whatever your hair journey may be.  Where were these people 10-15 years ago?

 

Nevertheless  I did’t get all the knots out so I had to cut it all around about an inch to where the base of the top knot that wouldn’t come out was and it looked really stupid.

 

So on May 10^th, 2011…I started the next chapter of my hair journey

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So whats’ your hair story?

 

Shamarah on Team Natural

 

Some of you have been inquiring about my journey so this is the latest!!  Wash day morning 10/13/12 (17 month mark )…. bantu knots, leave in conditioner/oil mix and no heat or stretch…shes’ about to go into braids, weaves, wigs …something for hibernation for the harsh NY winter…..Lords’ will see ya in the Spring!!!

October 2012

November 2012

Bantu knots, bagging and hot oil treatments……

December 2012

 

 

 

Shrinkage is a beast, but NO heat for me yet!!

Its growing!!!

Its’ always back to a headcovering……especially on bad hair days!!!.

Smooches, Shamarah